Friday, August 29, 2008

First day at the new house

Wednesday, August 27, 2008
First day at the new house

There’s no internet so I’ll just have to post this when we do get it, or when we go back to the old house tomorrow (if anyone remembers to bring you, too).

But yes, this is the first day that we’re (me, mommy and brian) staying the night at the new house.

It just so happens that I have no homework or tests to study for tomorrow unlike yesterday and the day before, where I had so much stuff to do for school. So now I’m bored. I knew that sooner or later, we’d be staying the night here most-likely without internet, so I downloaded a whole bunch of manga to read, but I don’t want to read it right now. And I already said that there’s no internet, and I don’t want to draw or write or do anything.

I cried a little bit earlier. They still haven’t moved our beds yet since it’s been raining constantly all week and weekend long (cuz of hurricane may or fay whatever it’s name is) so all I have in my room is a blanket to lay on, my school stuff, and some of the stuff that I packed.

So anyways, I was lying on my back a little bit away from my laptop listening to DBSK and not really thinking of anything. And then all of a sudden, the thought why aren’t I crying already? popped in my head, and I was coming up with reasons why I should be in my head. Like, michelle’s not here and I need her, and is this how it was supposed to be like when she moved away to college next year?

When those thoughts came to me, the feeling that you get before you feel your tears coming, came up and I willed the feeling away. It worked but then love in the ice came on and when I started singing to the beginning, my voice slowly started cracking up and then a tear came out. A second later, another one fell. I grabbed the edge of the blanket to smother my sobs and wipe off the tears. It didn’t last long, tho. I’m kinda proud of that, but now that I’m thinking about it, is it cuz I’m finally growing accustomed to this feeling? To being alone? Because very soon, we’ll be officially living here.

When I was taking a shower, I was thinking and I realized something. In all of those books where the main character is always alone for some reason or another, they ALWAYS have at least one person who understands them and is always there for them some way or another and that no book that I’ve read has the main character completely alone. I know that I have shelle, but it’s not the same. The main character’s friends are always there with them whether at school or any where else. And they’re usually in the same grade or school. Shelle is neither. And I cant really consider haley accountable either since I’ve never told her about how my life at school really is. I don’t want to tell the gang about how it is for me cuz I don’t want them to pity me or cry or anything.

Last week, I had this thought. I’m really jealous of Kelly and Lindsey. Even though they move around a lot, they will never be alone at school since they’re twins. I dunno how high school is for them though (if they’re in the same classes and stuff) since high school mixes everyone’s schedules, but I’m pretty sure that they have at least 2 classes with each other.

Today was the first meeting of the anime manga club. It was after school and it was pretty cool. A little overwhelming, but very cool and funny. Corey, when he was still in tech theater with me, he told me that he was trying to make an anime manga club, and I guess he finally did it. But it turns out that he wasn’t the president, though. He’s I think the vice president. The president is this girl who I’ve forgot her name but I do know her code name (everyone got to introduce themselves and then give a code name from a manga or anything that we could call them instead) is misa from deathnote. She even dressed like her, too, which was very cool. So yeah, there were A LOT of people there, which really surprised me even though it shouldn’t since this school is really big so there’s bound to be a lot of people who like manga and anime. But they were all pretty cool and funny. And michael, this guy from my science class showed me that the school’s library has a couple of how to draw manga/anime books. I cant wait to go to the library tomorrow! And I also found out that you could check out 2 books, too. XD

Now, I’m gonna go and daydream.

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